December 2012.
Finding Kelly and Dr. Sanjay has been a wonderful blessing. Gradually, my fear begins to subside. They both have the most calming affect on all of the patients that come through the clinic. Kelly spends her time there talking to others about her experiences and everything she knows about cancer. There is not one person that doesn’t feel better after chatting with her.
Over the past few months, I have met other women that have all been diagnosed with cancer and had various levels of treatment through The Agency. We formed a little club and have elected Kelly as our ring leader. We get together at Crossroads, the clinic where we have our IVs, talk about cancer, life, our kids and dogs. The six of us cram into a room made for two with poor Dr. Sanjay running around trying to treat us in all the mayhem of six women laughing and sometimes crying together. Of everything that we have collectively been through, being together has been the best therapy by far.
Before I met Kelly, I met Tina. She is a fireball, smart, and I love her quick wit and no nonsense demeanour. This girl is funny. When I first met her, she looked way too young to have cancer. But then again, weren’t we all? Tina had early stage breast cancer and opted for a bi-lateral mastectomy. She refused Tamoxifen - like I said, she’s really smart. Her cancer was caught early enough that she didn’t need chemo or radiation.
Then came Bonnie. She’s a real beauty and one seriously cool chick. She’s one of the most authentic people that I have ever met. She’s a no bullshit, tell it like it is kinda’ girl. Far too young to be diagnosed with colon cancer, she had surgery and started chemo, only to quit shortly after. Bonnie was the first in our group to call bullshit on The Agency and the crap that they are feeding cancer patients. Her eyes were wide open from the beginning. Another smartie.
Kelly and I were having our IVs one Saturday morning when Char came barrelling in, guns blazing. This girl was a powerhouse from the beginning. She had been through the gamut of treatment for breast cancer - surgery, chemo, radiation but she had refused Tamoxifen. Her hair was spiky from just having finished chemo and she had incredible energy. Her smile lit up the room and Kelly and I had to giggle when she dropped f-bombs left, right and centre. This lady is not one to hold back. She is taking cancer on with every ounce of her being.
Finally came Lindsay. Of all of us in our little group, Lindsay is the gentle soul. She is sweet and kind, always smiling, and yet the fear of cancer grabs a hold of her too easily. She also has breast cancer and has done The Agency protocol. Kelly gently guides her away from the fear and tries to help her see that she can manage her cancer. Lindsay is a reluctant believer. She, of all of us, is struggling the most to get past it all.
If you are battling cancer, you need to find your people. The people who truly understand what you are going through every day. The people that you can tell the truth to without scaring the shit out of them. This group of ladies are a godsend. We become fast friends and spend our time together hooked up to IV poles, sharing what we are learning, laughing and crying, but mostly laughing. We have been through it all. We get each other. We all understand what we have been through. They are my posse, my squad, my tribe.
They are my lifeline.
- Kim
photo: getty images